Strange Sequitur

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taejira:

bigjaeger:

a support group for vampires who were turned as children or adolescents. a bunch of small, melancholy kid-shaped vampires sitting around in somebody’s living room talking very seriously in tiny voices about current events in the vampire world. a lot of them dress like grandmas because they are as old as a grandma, maybe even ten grandmas. they have a network system where they can call adult-looking vampires to help them get things, drive places, pretend to be parents so child-looking vampires can get into adult movies 

   

(Source: lafresque)

QI IS ON HULU THIS IS NOT A DRILL QI IS ON HULU EVEN FOR THOSE OF US IN THE STATES WHY DID NOBODY TELL ME ABOUT THIS IT’S NOT THE FULL ARCHIVE OF EPISODES BUT THE MOST RECENT SEASONS/SERIES ARE THERE AMERICANS CAN WATCH IT ALL LEGAL-LIKE NOW BRITISH COMEDY PANEL GAMES WITHOUT THE OOGY GUILTY FEELING THAT COMES ALONG WITH MEDIA PIRACY EXCEPT AS IN REGARDS TO THE OLDER SEASONS WHICH WILL STILL HAVE TO BE A THING I GUESS AS WE ALL WAIT FOR DVDS.

GUYYYYS.

Edit: Except they aren’t the XL versions.  …  Goatfuckers.  *grump*

copperbadge:

jabberwockypie:

bifrostedcharms:

jabberwockypie:

thegavichal:

Scrolling down facebook and i see a recommended post…

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wow that looks familiar

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yup. sounds about right. 

I do not/can not drink and I GUARANTEE YOU that I would not require alcohol to enjoy this.

And yet I feel like more complicated rules could be instituted to make it more fun.  (Though possibly less safe for drunk people - but why are you playing with knives, drunk people?)

I NEED TO DO THIS. DOES SOMEONE HAVE A ROOMBA I CAN BORROW? I ONLY HAVE ONE.

Okay, but I think we have to ask copperbadge : could a Neato beat a Roomba in mortal combat?

A Neato could beat a Roomba in a race. IDK about mortal combat.

The thing is that Roombas are so adorable because they are fumblers. They don’t really clean systematically, they just kind of fucking wander until they’ve hoovered the entire floor. Their search pattern is random.

Neatos aren’t that way. They start at an edge, follow it until they can’t anymore, turn, follow the new wall until they can’t, and just keep going in ever tightening circles. They’re much more systematic and while they probably don’t clean as well, they’re also MUCH faster. So the Neato doesn’t care that the Roomba is off in a corner bonking a wall with its balloon, the Neato just keeps going on its mission no matter what. 

I saw this on my dash about three hours ago.  Then I got to the part of my evening where I go browse the Rooster Teeth-ey bits of YouTube, and… yep.

I am somehow completely unsurprised that these drunk idiots are those drunk idiots.  I am, however, a bit shocked that this is taking place at home, and not in the office.

copperbadge:

ellidfics:

Have you ever read anything about Han van Meegeren, the man who forged the Vermeers?  He’s fascinating, and there are a couple of decent books about him.

LET ME YELL A LITTLE TO THE INTERNET AT LARGE ABOUT MY LOVE FOR HAN VAN MEEGEREN

HE COMBINES ALL OF MY FAVOURITE THINGS

  • SAYING “FUCK YOU” TO ART SNOBBERY
  • CON MEN WITH HEARTS OF GOLD
  • TECHNICAL SKILLS USED IN THE COMMISSION OF HILARIOUS CRIMES
  • ART HISTORY
  • TERRIBLE THINGS HAPPENING TO NAZIS

THE BEAUTY OF VAN MEEGEREN IS THAT HE STARTED FORGING VERMEERS BECAUSE CRITICS HATED HIS ART (WHICH WAS ADMITTEDLY KIND OF TERRIBLE) BUT THEN WHEN HE STARTED PAINTING VERMEERS HE STUDIED THEM REALLY HARD AND LEARNED ABOUT AGING TECHNIQUES AND PAINTED THE SHIT OUT OF SOME FAKE VERMEERS 

AND OKAY MAYBE HE CHEATED SOME PEOPLE BUT I’M SORT OF INCLINED TO FORGIVE HIM BECAUSE IT’S NOT LIKE THEY WEREN’T RICH ENOUGH TO TAKE THE HIT AND THEN

GET THIS

HE SOLD A FAKE VERMEER TO A NAZI BANKER WHO SOLD IT TO HERMANN GOERING

WHO GOT HIS JOLLIES STEALING ART FROM AND THEN BRUTALLY MURDERING THE ENTIRE JEWISH POPULATION OF EVERYWHERE HE WENT

SO FUCK GOERING.

AND AFTER THE WAR VAN MEEGEREN WAS BROUGHT UP ON CHARGES OF COLLUDING WITH THE ENEMY BECAUSE HE SOLD VERMEERS TO COMMANDER SHITHEAD OVER THERE

AND VAN MEEGEREN WAS LIKE

"Naw bro that was a fake I just brought tons of legit art and money into the country by cheating Nazis with a bunch of forged paintings."

SO THEY LOCKED HIM IN A ROOM AND SAID IF YOU’RE SO CLEVER AND THOSE REALLY WERE FAKE, DO IT AGAIN

AND WITH DECADES OF HIS FREEDOM AT STAKE

HE PAINTED A VERMEER

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"Jesus Among the Doctors" aka "Young Christ in the Temple" aka "SCHOOLED YOU LOL" please note still kind of a shitty artist, you make the baby Vermeer cry

SO HE WAS ALL *MIC DROP* BUT THEN HE HAD TO PICK THE MIC BACK UP BECAUSE HE WAS CHARGED WITH FORGERY AND SENTENCED TO A YEAR IN PRISON.

BEFORE THE SENTENCE COULD BE CARRIED OUT HE DIED, WHICH IS SAD

BUT HIS SECOND WIFE GOT TO KEEP ALL THE PROCEEDS OF HIS DASTARDLY DEALINGS BECAUSE OF LEGAL DOODAHERY AND THAT SET HER UP FOR LIFE

SO BASICALLY HAN VAN MEEGEREN: SHITTY PAINTER, GOOD HUSBAND, EXEMPLARY CON MAN, MADE HIS BONES CHEATING NAZIS. 

OKAY TUMBLR. IT’S TIME TO SETTLE THIS ONCE AND FOR ALL.

unlockaflockofwords:

snorting-coke-with-kids:

forfksakes:

batmansymbol:

Reblog this if you pronounce “.gif” as “GIF.”

NOT JIF,

GIF.

And here is the link for the opposite.

WE SHALL SEE WHICH ONE PREVAILS.

omg it’s pronounced JIF, if any of you had ever actually taken the time to look up what it actually means, or take a fucking computer course you’d know how to pronounce it. Like do you think Tumblr invented gifs?! It’s a fucking format! Like how retarded is this website…..

Chelsey, calm the fuck down.

It’s pronounced ‘Gif’ because ‘Jif’ is a fucking stupid way to pronounce the acronym for Graphic Image Format, and because language is organic, and whining that the asshats who invented the word pronounce it with a soft G doesn’t change the fact that the most intuitive pronunciation is the hard G version. And that’s the one that will endure as gifs become a mainstream thing.

(I once had a cookery teacher who insisted on pronouncing ‘margarine’ as ‘mar-green’ on the basis that this was the pronunciation originally intended by the inventors of the word. She was an asshole.)

I’m throwing in a respectful counterargument for “jif” being perfectly intuitive.  Gif, when pronounced as a word, (which I’m frankly still opposed to; three letters is three syllables it’s not that taxing to just spell it out, people) isn’t a directly shortened version of “Graphic Image Format” itself, it’s a shortened version of the file extension “.gif,” which is pronounced “dot-gee-eye-eff.”  The G sound in the letter G is soft.  Gee-eye-eff, geeeyeeff, jif.  In English, Gs tend to be soft when they proceed E, I or Y, and hard when they proceed A, O or U.

But, again, I’m a luddite who still says gee-eye-eff.  Dot-gee-eye-eff if I’m feeling formal.

unlockaflockofwords:

sherlockian-spockian-who:

a-cumberbatch-of-cookies:

beepony:

alicia-mb:

Just one of those things that I always wondered about. Stags and otters are all very well, but what if you end up with a tiny chameleon or giant blue whale? I mean, it could be a giant tub of nutella…

Anyway, so glad I got around to doing this pic -drawing the less attractive animals was awesome.

Popped it up on Redbubble because they have tote bags and cushions now which is just wow - can grab it also on cards or posters - check it out here!

magikarp tho

SLOTH

REASONS WHY THIS SHOW IS AMAZING

…Harry Potter isn’t a show?

BLUE WHALE.

detectivanilla:

percymyjackson:

So my driving teacher has three fingers on one hand and four on the other and he makes puns about it and it’s great. And today he was like “I went to the museum and found my ancestors’ look guys!” And showed us this…

WHY DOES THIS NOT HAVE MORE NOTES

detectivanilla:

percymyjackson:

So my driving teacher has three fingers on one hand and four on the other and he makes puns about it and it’s great.
And today he was like
“I went to the museum and found my ancestors’ look guys!”
And showed us this…

WHY DOES THIS NOT HAVE MORE NOTES

jon-snow:

god bless sdcc

darkesthorizons:

neptuneisforlovers:

ITS NOT SEWING SUPPLIES!

My question is how does every single person identify with this, is it like a secret rule to use those for sewing supplies?

darkesthorizons:

neptuneisforlovers:

ITS NOT SEWING SUPPLIES!

My question is how does every single person identify with this, is it like a secret rule to use those for sewing supplies?

(Source: ofela)

Tumblr app, y u reverse italics and bold? Y u vanish without warning while I’m reading?

- Mental_Floss on YouTube Episode 79: 79 Common Mispronunciations
This is my new reaction gif for whenever I see a video featuring people talking about “Ass Burgers.”  (I’m trying to work my way through my “You should gif this!” folder, but the end results always end up either too fast or too slow.  And how they look in the Photoshop preview vs. in Irfanview once exported vs. in the Tumblr photo post dialog never matches up.  So this post may disappear immediately if it looks like John Green is trapped in a bullet-time slow motion hell once this uploads.)

- Mental_Floss on YouTube Episode 79: 79 Common Mispronunciations

This is my new reaction gif for whenever I see a video featuring people talking about “Ass Burgers.”  (I’m trying to work my way through my “You should gif this!” folder, but the end results always end up either too fast or too slow.  And how they look in the Photoshop preview vs. in Irfanview once exported vs. in the Tumblr photo post dialog never matches up.  So this post may disappear immediately if it looks like John Green is trapped in a bullet-time slow motion hell once this uploads.)

everythingsbetterwithbisexuals:

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*chokes*

(x)

Wait, didn’t Rose attend that one dance party down on the Poorfolk Level?

sebadasstian-stan:

[x]

awkward-lee:

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Blaine proposing to Disney Princesses plus Gaston

I keep forgetting that some of the people I follow also happen to be Rooster Teeth fans.  “Good lord, why does this guy look so much like Bl… oh.”

maccasass:

secretlifeofageekygirl:

So I was watching Supernatural and my dad walks in and all casual says ” Is this the show that your second cousin is in” and I’m just kinda like “ha ha dad very funny” but then he says “No seriously, his name is… Marvin? Mica? I don’t know, something weird like that.” and he just walks away

That’s the story of how I found out that I’m related to Misha Collins and died

#so real talk about much porn do you think she’s read about her cousin

(Source: lucyinthesky451)